I don’t want to pretend like have it all put together. Frankly, I just don’t. I get angry, bitter, depressed, upset, and sometimes feel inadequate at the momhood thing. I didn’t grow up with people to point me to Christ. I didn’t grow up in a functional home. I grew up in a disaster. I grew up wondering if I would make it another day. I grew up wishing, hoping, and praying someone would save us. I raised two kiddos before I was 18. I spent my childhood being a mother.
I wonder what it would be like to have a mom to call to get advise from. I wonder what it would be like to have a dad here on earth that cared.
I know what it’s like feeling like you live in literal hell here on earth. You have to pretend everything is okay. Growing up people always saw me as quiet and timid. What they didn’t realize is that in order to survive at home, I had to be silent.
I say all of that to say this. Even though, I have no idea what Godly motherhood is suppose to look like. Even though, I feel like a failure. Even though, I have no idea how to be a Godly wife. Even though, I feel like I have no purpose sometimes. Even though, even though, even though… God has placed so many people into my life to show me what real love is. He has put people in my life to show me how to be a Godly mother.
I feel like we need to remember not everyone has it all together. Not everyone grew up with it all together, and that is okay. He makes beauty out of ashes, and I thank Jesus everyday for that!❤
I encourage you, if you come from brokeness like I did. Look around you. See who shows the love of Christ to others and their families. Mentor them. Ask them for advise. Seek wisdom and guidance from them. You my friend are worth it!
From ashes to beauty,